laura ells

nemo enim fere saltat sobrius, nisi forte insanit.

I got a BA in art. Now I live with my parents and my cat and work in retail.

So, this is happening… part 2!

Because part 1 was exceedingly long and lacking in general amusement I have decided to put together a list of things I have done over the past three weeks to stave off boredom while on lorazepam.

Things I Have Done Over the Last Three Weeks to Stave Off Boredom While on Lorazepam:

  • watch seasons 1-3 of “Game of Thrones”.
  • read the first 370 pages of the book A Game of Thrones, decide to get back to it after I’m finished being interrupted by other things
  • watch “Orange is the New Black” on Netflix
  • play a crap-load of of “The Secret Society-Hidden Mystery” on my iPad (level 96 at the moment, what what!)
  • rediscover the joy of British panel shows
  • watch a lot of British panel shows
  • at one point I watched Mission Impossible 3
  • collect all 8 badges from the gym leaders, defeat the elite four, defeat my rival, and beat Pokemon Blue on gameboy
  • not wear a bra 99.9% of the time
  • shower infrequently
  • get a good night’s sleep more often than not
  • spend a lot of time with my cat (when she’s willing)
  • spend hours on BuzzFeed, trying to keep up with the “relevant news”
  • there’s probably more that I’m forgetting. I’ll call it “other forgettable mind excursions.”

At least I’ve never been the type of person who worries/thinks about the future. I’ve always been more of the “be here now” type. That, I’ve found, is conductive with my current comings and goings (metaphorically, because you shouldn’t drive while on lorazepam).

So, this is happening…

I haven’t done anything on here for a while now. Thanks to those who have continued following me despite that. I wanted to write a bit about what has been going on in my life recently, more specifically, my health (Bear in mind, when I say “a bit” I really mean “a butt-load”).

So, if you want to know more about my most recent reason for copious doctors appointments, read on! (spoiler alert: there’s vertigo, a mysterious tremor, and a cameo appearance of a barbarian horde .)

Read More

health vertigo tremors demon arm lorazepam mri

Recent Development

UPDATE: yeah, so it happened. awhile ago. sorry.

I’m going to be showing my rocking chairs illustrations at Atomic Cafe in Beverly, MA! Atomic is one of my favorite places and I am very excited! When I lived in Beverly I would go to Atomic at the very least once a week. Usually more. Like 2 or 3 times a week. No wonder I was broke when I graduated.

I’ll post more details when I know them.


I have something to admit. I am really hesitant about breaking the status quo that has been established as of late. the status quo being living with my parents and working in retail. and that hesitation, my dislike of change, is prohibiting me from making art, moving forward. why am I hesitating? nothing original. I am scared. terrified that once someone gives me a chance I’ll blow it and no one will give me a second thought. I’m scared that I’m not good enough to be a real artist. I can be an art student at a small liberal art school with a very supportive team of professors surrounded by friends and people in the same situation. that is easy. this is hard.

don’t talk on your cell phone while you are shopping

stores are not appropriate places to have personal conversations. a quick conversation is okay, but other than that, just don’t. please.

a customer today was talking on her phone while she was walking towards the fitting rooms, hoping to try on her selected apparel. she did not stop talking to politely ask me if she could try on said items. instead, with hardly a look in my direction, she pointed towards me and then towards the fitting rooms, ordering me to tend to her needs. there was already a room unlocked. I just pointed her towards the open door. 

another customer was on her phone for the entire length of her visit to my little place of employment. she did not interact with any of the employees, she continued to talk while trying on things (I don’t know how this is done. I need to hands to get dressed. maybe she was hiding a third and that’s why she avoided human interaction), and even continued her conversation while returning one shirt and purchasing another (while talking to her phone companion about said returned shirt). even at the register she didn’t pause once in her conversation to address us employees. there were four of us just looking at her while she avoided eye contact. then she left, still on the phone. the whole experience lasted at least a half an hour. and I can tell you, based on the one side of the conversation that I did hear, it did not sound urgent.

both of these women left messes in the fitting rooms for me to clean up, but that is another point that I may or may not address at another time.

is it too much to ask, as a retail employee, to be treated like a human being? before I was one of these under-appreciated and hard-working individuals I would have said no. but now my opinion has changed. you may have noticed that I just wrote that retail employees are hard-working. don’t ever let anyone tell you anything different. we are on our feet all day. those of us who do not ring walk back and forth (always at a brisk pace) countless times throughout the day. some of us do things like set up shelving, put together visual displays, unpack shipment, etc. it can get pretty labor intensive. and for me at least, this is all done in work appropriate clothing.

so please, respect the employees when you shop.

retail work rude people cell phones


here are some robots that I’ve drawn while on break at work:

my stuff robots

christmas music

the store where I work has been playing christmas music since november 1st. at first it was just one song every 5 or so non-christmas songs. but now that is over. for a whole week it has been the opposite, only instead of catching a break every 5 or so songs, I swear it is probably 10. and this is tough. to make it even worse, there is no variety. every day I hear “sleigh ride,” “let it snow,” “santa clause is coming to town,” “the man with the bag,” “rudolph the red-nosed reindeer,” “have yourself a merry little christmas,” white christmas,” “all I want for christmas is my two front teeth,” “so this is christmas,” and “santa baby” at least 5 times a day. and a number of those have different versions that play. sometimes one after another. and during my break if I choose to leave the store, which I usually do, there is christmas music playing on the loud speaker of the outdoor plaza. saturday night I felt like screaming because I thought my head was going to explode. but there were a lot of people walking by. I don’t think I can last another month. I will go crazy.

retail work christmas music torture


so my friend tim lewis is doing a not-so-dry-and boring retelling of the bible over on his blog and he asked me if I would like to contribute some illustrations. I said yes, so now you should go check out the first installment.

current things

I got a job earlier this month. I’m working retail. It is interesting. One thing that is particularly interesting is how much more exhausting being on your feet for 5+ hours a day can be. I’ve been sleeping a lot more than I’m used to. I told my mom yesterday that I think I need more sleep working retail than I did being an art student. She told me that maybe I just have more opportunities to sleep than I did while in school. This makes sense.

At first I didn’t think the long hours on my feet would be a particularly new thing for me. After all, some of my studio classes required me to stand for long periods of time. But I’ve come to realize that I was able to sit down much more than I realized. Also, the tasks I was completely whilst standing - such as inking a plate and printing said plate in printmaking, or carving a block of limestone or alabaster - proved to distract my mind and body from the exhaustion that standing and walking around for long periods at a time seemed to be causing. Unfortunately, folding clothes and the like has not proved to be quite as stimulating. Also, I was spoiled my last semester, completing the majority of my thesis sitting down - albeit hunched over, resulting in different problems. But the most crucial discovery I have made is that I need to find better shoes.

On an unrelated note, the keyboard problems I mentioned have disappeared. It seems the problems arose because of my computer’s perception of the control key being engaged when it had not been. At the height of the problem my keyboard became utterly useless, as engaging the control key negates the ability to use the keyboard normally. However, I updated all my software - something I had been putting off as it required me to restart my computer - and everything seems to be behaving correctly. Except that the esc key still does not work, but that is very easy to work around. 

work living with my parents macbook keyboard life after graduation

keyboard malfunctions

Recently the keyboard of my macbook has been giving me great difficulty. Specifically, some of the keys have stopped working. The keys in question, chronologically as best as I can remember, are the “esc”, “p”, “;”, “:”, “/”, “?”, “-“, “_”, “" , “|”,  and “return”.

All but “return” are refusing to work at all while “return” is still at the stage where it chooses when to work and malfunctions at its leisure. I’ve had to resort to copying and pasting whenever I’ve needed to use one of the keys in question. “esc”, or course, has simply fallen into extinction in terms of its usefulness. I wonder which keys will become defunct next?

Has anyone else been afflicted with similar frustrations? If so, how did you fix it? I haven’t found anything useful in my searches through the interwebs and I’m not really jumping at the chance to take my dilemma to the Apple Store as my warranty ran out. 

frustration apple macbook keyboard malfuction